Amber Had Nothing To Do With That

I'm sure you're all expecting us to be all "Hey! All your previous assumptions about the death of Jesus are wrong! Amber did it!"

But no, that is not the case. We have pretty good evidence that Amber was in fact in Africa at the time sowing the seeds for the economic underdevelopment that they will experience over the next 2000 odd years.

Amber did however eat Jesus when he returned to do the whole fulfil prophecy thing that he promised he'll do.